<!-- --><!-- --><style type="text/css">@import url(http://beta.blogger.com/css/navbar/classic.css); div.b-mobile {display:none;} </style> <meta name='google-adsense-platform-account' content='ca-host-pub-1556223355139109'/> <meta name='google-adsense-platform-domain' content='blogspot.com'/> <!-- --><style type="text/css">@import url(https://www.blogger.com/static/v1/v-css/navbar/3334278262-classic.css); div.b-mobile {display:none;} </style> </head><body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/6548311697007294092?origin\x3dhttp://simplyher-xiaohui.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script> <iframe src="http://beta.blogger.com/navbar.g?blogID=36048451" height="30px" width="100%" marginwidth="0" marginheight="0" scrolling="no" id="navbar-iframe" frameborder="0"></iframe> <div id="space-for-ie"></div>
Tuesday, May 5, 2009

i hate the way i am feeling now
i dislike being alone
and only if he is there for me right now
that would sastify me

sunday is my first day returning back to work after nearly two months. glad to see those regular faces. suppose to work until 11pm but ended up helping up hisam with OT. its a good thing. i can earn more money and in the same time occupy myself with thing. next working day tml.

last night, i cried so hard. i am totally lost. i will never forget this incident. this is my first time going through it. seriously i am utterly disappointed and pain. tears just cant stop flowing down. i cried more harder and harder. i dont wish to be seen as such a person in your eyes. i knew that its no point saying this now as everything had been solved. still i couldnt digest the facts though i knew that my inner conscience is very clear. i know you are trying to get an answer to it despite of your harsh way of asking. during this two month i never lie to you before. i understand you well though its just short period. you know i hate liars and i dont like to hide thing. same goes to you. we have the same thoughts. last night incident made me come to a several thoughts. all along am i really such a person in your eyes? do you really have the trust in my words? sigh.i had already explained everything. i am sorry for marking an awful comments on her. you will never get to know whether if she did betray you behind.

sometimes i wonder, why god put us in such situation? perhaps back then we couldnt understand why each other did the things we did or understand howeach other felt. and how things turned out to be in this way. i always believe everything happen for a reason. nobody to be blamed. and for that,i am sorry. sorry to be is always a hardest and saddest word. humans will only learn to cherish when they lose something important to them.

lastly before i forgotten, ever since last week, i have decided to remove my nickname. no more xiaohui but jiahui. the reason i wouldnt mention much over here. i wanna be a better person and not bothering about those stuff anymore. all those are the past. i believe everyone goes through different stages in lifes. we experience a lot of things, and every stage in lifes will always be a lesson learnt. i will never regret things that i chose to do thus i will never regret removing my nickname. people who know me will be shock to see this?

there is so many things i wanted to say to you. but i just couldnt pharse it out verbally. i do not have the courage nor confidence. one day i will tell you everything what i would want to say. but nevertheless, i hope i am the one whom is your last love. love is complicated but nothing is impossible.

to watch you, to guide you through the darkest of your days
just wanna go through the bad and good life together ahead.
the path would be tough, i believe given time, we will make it through.
therefore, i pray that things will turn better each day. god bless.

Blogged @ 11:59 PM
Don't let me go -